--Amelia Granger
The Federal Reserve’s new Operation Twist is supposed to “twist” the yield curve, but an image of the Mad Men-era central bankers twistin’ the night away isn’t too far off base. The Fed strategy was first rolled out in the 60s, and was named after the dance craze then sweeping the nation. But the nation has seen a few crazy dances since the Twist. If governmental “operations” to boost the economy are going to be named after ways to boogie, why not go all the way?
The Macarena:
Popular dance in the ‘90s—mainly because it allowed legions of uncoordinated people to suddenly feel apt at rhythmic Latin dances, usually beyond their reach. Also in the ‘90s, the Fed started lowering interest rates, in a move some say sowed the seeds of rampant mortgage lending that reaped the subprime mortgage bubble. The Fed’s pledge in early-August 2011 to keep interest rates near zero through 2013 got no snappy name. Memo to the Fed: it’s the 20th anniversary of Nirvana’s Nevermind. Nineties nostalgia is cool again. Let’s dub the Fed’s new move to “go low” on interest rates “Operation Macarena.”
The Hokey Pokey:
Auditing the Fed is getting a lot of play this year in the many, many Republican debates. From former Fed Board of Governors member Herman Cain to long-time Fed critic Ron Paul, candidates agree auditing the shadowy body is a good idea. Call it “Operation Hokey Pokey,” allowing presidential hopefuls to “put your whole self in,” “shake it all about” and then learn “that’s what it’s all about.”
The Y-M-C-A:
This dance craze imagines a world where, “it’s fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A.” But millions of foreclosed-on homeowners already know The Y and other low-rent temporary options are no laughing matter. Rock-bottom rates aren’t being passed on fast enough to borrowers. That, combined with lenders’ unwillingness to offer refinancing, means Chairman Ben Bernanke should stop being such a “Macho Man” and admit low mortgage rates aren’t doing enough to keep homeowners off the streets.